Blog Archives

SEC Power Rankings: U-G-L-Y, You Ain’t Got No Alibi…

Hey yo, people, it’s time for the SEC Power Rankings again, and there’s a lot of ugly in this installment, including some ugly language from a certain Kentucky football coach. Just the fact I cite Bl–cher Rep-rt makes this entry

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SEC Power Rankings: Stealing Saban, Swinging Richt, Spanking Sumlin

The SEC Power Rankings are grumpy today, because brake jobs cost way too dang much. Makes a man want to steal something. Like, I dunno… ––––– Team (Pvs): Comment 1. Alabama (1): …maybe a cardboard cutout of Nick Saban? It was

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SEC Power Rankings: Let’s Make a T-Shirt About It

I’m glad everyone enjoyed last week’s Harry Potter-themed SEC Power Rankings. There is no theme this week, I’m afraid, but one team did make a big jump in the rankings. Who? Hint: The head coach’s name rhymes with “bark licked.” –––––

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SEC Power Rankings: A Very Harry Potter Hallowe’en

Hallowe’en approacheth (just six days away!), which gives me a great excuse to do a Harry Potter-themed Power Rankings. It has the Bob Carskadon stamp of approval, so it’s legit. What I’ve done is taken SEC players and coaches and

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SEC Power Rankings: Suplexes, Lee Corso in Jorts, and ‘Johnny Football’ is Gonna Die

Hey, y’all remember that time I dropped Alabama from my No. 1 spot and replaced it with South Carolina? NO, YOU DON’T ACTUALLY. ––––– Team (Pvs): Comment 1. Alabama (2): So apparently Nick Saban does not approve of his players

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SEC Power Rankings: Hey, Let’s Call Up Dabo Swinney

You know, Nick Saban has commented on how people are hyping up his team too much, so I’m gonna do the man a favor and drop Alabama down in my power rankings. Gasp! I know, right? Ah, what the heck, it’s

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SEC Power Rankings: Even Great Players Can Have Terrible Nicknames

As promised, I’ve shaken up the ol’ SEC Power Rankings this week. They were due for a reconfiguration, mainly because my previous rankings were just wack. Something to note: I have Georgia rated higher than South Carolina, and LSU higher

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SEC Power Rankings: The Dark [Insert Name] Rises

Hey there, people. It’s late, but here are this week’s SEC Power Rankings. They probably go down better with a nightcap anyway. Enjoy. ––––– Team (Pvs): Comment 1. Alabama (1): Nick Saban apparently is impervious to the inspirational words of

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SEC Power Rankings: Will Jared Lorenzen Weigh In This Weekend?

Hey, the SEC Power Rankings are here again, and we’ve got some change at the top. That’s what happens when you play such a pansy schedule, LSU – and when Alabama beats Arkansas 52-0 on the road. Here we go.

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SEC Power Rankings: In Which Louis Watson’s Parents Call Auburn’s Plays

You know what the SEC Power Rankings need? A pointless, irrelevant music-related hook. Just because. I picked up an album last night by a new band called Discount Guns, and if you like the raw, immensely satisfying sounds of the

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